Since the 3rd week of October, I was on the verge of breaking down. Heart always felt broken, rotten, and decaying inside my body. Apart from the fact that there’s no moment of everyday that my eyes swells because of crying. I even develop a timely habit that every 11 p.m, I would just sit in the corner of my bed and just cry my eyes out, and pitied myself for comprising to the demands of other people.
Slowly, I’m dying.
I don’t know what to do anymore. This stage of my life felt like a new book, I randomly picked at the library, with no idea where, when to start.( That’s a wrong metaphor.)Or rather, a blank canvas,beautifully stretched, purely white, laying in wall , and ready to be painted on, but nothing’s happening.
Tormented with the cold wall I lay.
Alone with nothing.
And then, I asked myself “what the hell happened to me?”.Nothing.I just trusted someone who can never trust me and will never see as trustworthy for theirs.
I guess this is a sign that I should stop.Refrain from trusting to much.Or< I should die,because no one is will to be my friend.
Apparently, my life sucks and I wanna die.
P.S. I really wanna die right now.(Kung pwedeng maging seafoam, gugustuhin ko din yun.)